The Lord is good. He has a way of meeting us where we are at, always. He has a way of knowing when the spinning starts, and a “Stop. Now look Me in the eyes.”  is needed to settle our panicked hearts. I awoke yesterday morning after a fitful day before yesterday. My eyes were still unable to focus even after the usual letting the dog out and starting the coffee routine. As I sat down with my fresh brewed coffee and toast, I knew I could not dig in the Word for myself this morning, I needed to be fed. So to RZIM on youtube I went, and there the Lord gave my weary soul a drink.

I have a speaking engagement planned for May 3rd. Since the “yes” to this invitation, the spinning has come. The scatter brained, the lost feeling, the instability of uncertainty, all began clouding my mind. As a woman, the enemy of my soul always gets me with things like, “You are a woman, how dare you think you have the right to teach. You don’t have a degree, who will honor your words? No one will come to hear you because you are a woman. You know you will be the ruin of their opportunity to share the gospel. You need to quit. Tell them to find another.”

True story: It was at twelve years old that I first understood the gospel and began going after God with all my heart to the best of my ignorant ability. At this time in my life I would have nightmares that would wake me up and I would be so terrified that I would go and crawl in the bed with my parents. There are two dreams that I have never been able to shake. Here almost thirty years later I still remember them.

In the first I was roller skating in some type of rink that was built in a huge tree. The skating lanes wound all up and down and around in the branches. As I was coming down a lane I was grabbed by the throat and lifted off my feet by a huge Goliath of a man dressed in red, also on skates. He lifted me by my throat up above his head and I couldn’t breath and the weight of the skates kept me from being able to kick my feet. I remember clearly him telling me, “Christians like you should be dead!” and then I woke up.

The second is more foggy, but was more terrifying. This one I was asleep in my dream and the next thing I knew I awoke and was surrounded by small dark somethings that I couldn’t make out, but they were everywhere around me. Then they pounced on me, once again grabbing me by my throat and choking me. I mean choking me to where in my dream I could not breathe. In my dream I began to mentally pray and ask the Lord to help and somehow I managed enough breath to get out “In the name of Jesus get off me” At that very moment, as the words were coming out of my mouth, I passed from dream to awake. I sat up in the bed as the words were still coming out of my mouth.  I was out of breath as if I really had been being choked. Needless to say, this one sent me to my parents bedroom and I crawled underneath the covers in between them for safety.

As I write this the Holy Spirit has quickened my heart and mind to the parable of the seed and the sower,

“Now the parable is this: the seed is the word of God. Those beside the road are those who have heard; then the devil comes and takes away the word from their heart, so that they will not believe and be saved. Those on the rocky soil are those who, when they hear, receive the word with joy; and these have no firm root; they believe for a while, and in time of temptation fall away. The seed which fell among the thorns, these are the ones who have heard, and as they go on their way they are choked with worries and riches and pleasures of this life, and bring no fruit to maturity. But the seed in the good soil, these are the ones who have heard the word in an honest and good heart, and hold it fast, and bear fruit with perseverance.”

Luke 8:11-15

For at least twelve years of my life the enemy of my soul did all he could to try and choke the Word out of me. Yet, it was planted in good soil and took root despite his best attempts.

However, I have learned that the sneaky snake still sends his creatures of darkness to creep in and try to grab me by my throat and choke me to silence. He has no couth about him, no limits to the tools of deceptions, and is no respecter of the person of manipulations that he will use to stop the exaltation of Christ, the Word of God now in flesh appearing. He will twist what he can and distort what he must in his attempts to snuff out the truth. His subtle attacks are sometimes the worst and often work the best because so many times we are clueless that it is him at work against us.

Last night, as I was picking up the house on my way to bed, after a week of worship, of teaching, of sharing the gospel, of praying, and feeling absolutely distracted and defeated afterwards, I simply could not shake the feeling that somehow I had screwed up royally. The uneasiness, the uncertainty, the spinning… and finally I cried out loud to my God and said, “Father, I cannot shake this feeling! I do not know if it is because I have said the wrong thing or the absolute right thing!” I continued to pray in my heart as I went up the stairs. Then I crawled underneath the covers and rested in the Lord.

Yesterday morning as I went to RZIM’s youtube channel and saw the title of one of the latest uploads, I recalled how earlier this month I had read a portion of a Bible study guide written by male pastor claiming that a woman has no right to be called a teacher… and I realized this was the arrow that the enemy had used to start my spinning.  I had asked the Lord for help and I believe He gave me this video,

“Isn’t the Bible sexist?”

I grow weary so often of the battle between myself and the enemy of my soul. With this video, the Lord reminding me again of these dreams from my childhood, and the Holy Spirit’s quickening to the words of Christ recorded in the book of Luke, and the confirmation through a prayer request sent to a friend. I know that this past week has been another subtle attack trying to choke me, trying to silence my voice, trying to keep me from using the tools and gifts that the Lord has given me to serve Him and share His truth. If a door opens for the gospel I’m walking through it. If any opportunity arises for me to use my voice to proclaim the Word of life and scatter its seed then I must. As long as I have breath I will praise the Lord, I will serve the Lord, I will proclaim His excellencies.

“These things I have spoken to you, so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world.”

John 16:33

There is a way that seems right to us but it is no where near right. There are times in life when we let our emotions get the best of us and our brains just flat out are not part of the equation.  Oh we claim we are thinking things through, but really we are not… we are thinking of ourselves. When we are only thinking of ourselves, then we definitely are not thinking any thing through.

If we take the time to walk trough the recorded life of David we see this acted out and laid out before us. We can choose to learn from it, or we can choose to ignore it and repeat it in our own lives. That is basically the steps of life. We either learn from the mistakes of others, the warnings of others, the wisdom of others, or we can learn from suffering the consequences of doing things our own way.

I went through a time in my life when I chose to learn everything the hard way… I would give anything to go back and learn from the mistakes, wisdom, and warnings of others. I know with all my heart that the Lord has a way of working all things out for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose, but I also believe that there are some things He wouldn’t have to “work out” if we were just listening and obeying to begin with. Suffering because life is hard is one thing. Suffering from the consequences of our rebellious heart is quite another.

There are four instances in the life of David that I want us to look at as we examine the thought of “What are you doing?” and learning from the mistakes, wisdom, and warning of others as opposed to learning from the suffering or our choices.

• The mistakes of others

David was a young man, newly anointed by the Lord, to be the next King of Israel. He was chosen by God because he was a man after God’s own heart. The Lord anointed him and then orchestrated events to get him up close and personal to the current king, Saul (1 Samuel 16 – 31). David was able to see and learn from the mistakes of Saul’s reign. He was able to learn that you do not touch the Lord’s anointed and when the Lord gives you a command in battle… you obey it fully.

•   The wisdom of others

While David was on the run from King Saul he and his men were close to Carmel. There was a man there named Nabal who had significant means. David sent his men to ask for provisions from Nabal and he not only refused, but did so quite snottingly. David was irate when his men returned with the news and so he gathered his men and was off to kill Nabal and every man associated with him. When Nabal’s wife, Abigail, heard of the exchange between Nabal and David’s men, she gathered up provisions and rushed to intercept David. She made it to him before he attacked and she offered great wisdom to him. David chose to listen. (1 Samuel 24). David was acting on tired emotion and utter frustration and not according to the will of God. Abigail stuck her neck out to there and she brought a word of wisdom from the Lord Himself and David received her words as such and he was saved from making a very huge mistake.

• The warnings of others

While David was in flight from Saul he went to the cave of Abdullah. His family met him there and many others also came to find him and so he was no longer alone in his flight. David went to Moab to ask the king if he would protect his parents and he left them with the and then returned to his hiding place. Then the prophet, Gad, came to him and warned him that he could not stay there any longer and needed to flee into the land of Judah. David heeded this warning and was able to escape Saul’s pursuit (1 Samuel 22).

These are the times that we have seen David choose to learn from the mistakes, wisdom, and warnings of others. Yet there times that he did not… and he had to learn through the sufferings of the consequences of his own choices. Lessons that I have no doubt that he would have given anything to not have to learn this way.

After David was well established as King of all Israel there came a time when he got off course. He was home when he should have been off to battle with his men. During the night he saw a woman bathing and well he wanted her. We see through the scriptures that David’s largest struggle was apparently his sexual appetite. At this point he already had at least seven wives that we know by name and no telling how many concubines.

However, this was not enough. He wanted this woman as well. He sent to inquire of her and the one sent offered a word of wisdom and warning to David, “Is this not Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam, the wife of Uriah the Hittite?” David would ignore the words of wisdom and warning and the downward spiral of sin would spin to depths that David never imagined he was capable (2 Samuel 11).

After David ignored this man’s warning, committed his sin, and made his best attempt to cover it by murdering her husband, the Lord sent someone else to him with a word. The prophet Nathan comes to David with a problem with two men and a lamb. One man owned a single treasured lamb and the other man had lambs out the wazoo, but the man with the lambs out the wazoo took the one treasured lamb of the other. David hears the scenario and in self-righteous anger pronounces a judgment to only have Nathan turn this judgment on him, for he was the man (2 Samuel 12).

David would spend the rest of his days wishing he had just listened to the warning, “Is this not Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam, the wife of Uriah the Hittite?” Yes, the Lord would forgive him. Yes, the Lord still loved him. Yes, life would go on… but the consequences would come.

So beloved of God here is the crux of the matter…

When someone comes to us and asks, “What are you doing?” Will we be one who is willing to learn from others mistakes, wisdom, and warnings?

When we see someone and ask ourselves, “What are they doing?” Will we be willing to be used by God to deliver those words of wisdom and warning?

Will we be willing even if the person we are being impressed to address might be in authority over us? Or a stranger to us? Or a friend to us?

And if we do, let us not forget HOW these words of wisdom and warning were delivered… Take the time to really read these accounts in the life of David and let us learn from him, and those associated with him. God gave us His Word so that we don’t have to always learn things the hard way.

Brethren, even if anyone is caught in any trespass, you who are spiritual, restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness; each one looking to yourself, so that you too will not be tempted.

Galatians 6:1

In my home state of Alabama we recently had a state of emergency weather alert. Schools were canceled all over our area and surrounding counties in order to keep our children safe. As our local meteorologist studied satellite images and made their best predictions as to what dangerous storms appeared to be heading our way, as our state government took the necessary steps needed to not burden our school administrators with  “make-up days” placed on them by other government entities, as businesses, churches, and parents focused on what we needed to do to make sure everyone was as SAFE as possible… a nation across the water was under a chemical attack.

Yesterday as we learned that the storms did NOT hit our area my social media newsfeed became filled with rants of those condemning our meteorologist and condemning those who condemned our meteorologist.

Such outrage over an attempt to keep our children and the people of our area as safe as possible… and no outrage… none over a chemical attack in Syria. Why? Because most were glued to the weather man because we have lost the ability to be able to walk outside and look out of our own windows and discern the signs of danger for ourselves.

But He replied to them, “When it is evening, you say, ‘It will be fair weather, for the sky is red.’ And in the morning, ‘There will be a storm today, for the sky is red and threatening.’ Do you know how to discern the appearance of the sky, but cannot discern the signs of the times?

Matthew 16:2-3

If we have become a people that cannot discern the approaching of a storm… how can we even come close to discerning the work of God in our midst? Do we really understand the times in which we live? Are we aware of the day? Are we so concerned with being SAFE that we cannot see those in danger?

Yet does not one in a heap of ruins stretch out his hand,
Or in his disaster therefore cry out for help?
Have I not wept for the one whose life is hard?
Was not my soul grieved for the needy?
When I expected good, then evil came;
When I waited for light, then darkness came.
I am seething within and cannot relax;
Days of affliction confront me.
I go about mourning without comfort;
I stand up in the assembly and cry out for help.
I have become a brother to jackals
And a companion of ostriches.

Job 30:24-29

We know that Job was in a place of great suffering. In the last verse of this passage he says that he has become a brother to jackals and a companion of ostriches. What could he mean by this?

Jackals mate in pairs and are territorial. Both the female and the male mark and defend the boundaries of their territory. Yipping calls are made when the family gathers. Here is the kicker: members only respond to their own family’s calls and ignore those of other individuals.

Ostriches, when threatened, run although their powerful, long legs can be formidable weapons, capable of killing a human or a potential predator like a lion with a forward kick. At the approach of trouble, ostriches will lie low and press their long necks to the ground in an attempt to become less visible. Their plumage blends well with sandy soil and, from a distance, gives the appearance that they have buried their heads in the sand.

So here’s the picture Job is painting for us. He needs help. He is crying out for help. He is in the midst of suffering. He is hurting. He has experienced great loss. He has spent his life helping others and now that he needs help… he finds himself among jackals and ostriches.

He realizes he is surrounded by those who only care if it’s their own and those who run from him and lie low so that they might claim they did not know of his pain or of his trouble.

We have a world full of Job’s…

And we have church buildings full of jackals and ostriches.

Church let us lift up our eyes and see. Let us learn again how to discern the signs of our times. Let us step out and hear the howls of those that are not our own and run to them in their pain and NOT away from them. Stop laying low and playing ignorant… when we know that we know someone needs the grace and mercy of God and the hands and feet and words and love of Jesus.

For the love of Christ and the call of His heart let us be willing to leave the safe ninety-nine and go after the one that is lost.

What man among you, if he has a hundred sheep and has lost one of them, does not leave the ninety-nine in the open pasture and go after the one which is lost until he finds it?

Luke 15:4