From Year to Year and Psalm to Psalm

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This time last year I wrote a post entitled “The 39th Year” where I shared how since I began walking with the Lord faithfully and purposely at His calling through Psalm 25 (just shy of the age of 25) the Lord has some how seemed to line my life up with the Psalm of my current age or at least it appears that way. However, the truth is the Lord is faithful to meet us where we are when we call to Him. I seek Him in the Psalms usually daily and He has never failed to meet me there.

I celebrated the beginning of my 40th year on the 12th of this month. Therefore, I turned to what I expected to be my new Psalm for the year, Psalm 40…

I waited patiently for the Lord;
And He inclined to me and heard my cry.
He brought me up out of the pit of destruction, out of the miry clay,
And He set my feet upon a rock making my footsteps firm.
He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God;
Many will see and fear
And will trust in the Lord.

Patience is something I struggle with in many ways. There are these meme’s

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Yeh, I’m probably the one getting looked at like that, but sorry, it’s not a race to the red light for me. It’s just this inward sense of urgency that when I have a destination I must get there… like yesterday.  I might procrastinate starting a thing, but once I start it I’m not stopping until it’s done. I don’t want any dilly dallying or poking around. This is not the time for window shopping or Sunday driving. It’s time to move!

I stepped out in obedience of faith last January and committed to the Lord that I would resign at my then position. I knew that God was moving me, although I did not know where, if any where. Then a new door appeared to open, but in May it was slammed shut. So in June my position ended and the journey of learning began.

I spent the month of June sending my husband a half a dozen different possibilities of future rolls for me in life. He finally told me, Nicole please just wait at least until August. So, I stopped, and I prayed, and I waited, and I wrestled with God. I wrestled and considered a thousand different possibilities it seemed, but my heart kept going back to that slammed door. I just couldn’t shake it.

How blessed is the man who has made the Lord his trust,
And has not turned to the proud, nor to those who lapse into falsehood.
Many, O Lord my God, are the wonders which You have done,
And Your thoughts toward us;
There is none to compare with You.
If I would declare and speak of them,
They would be too numerous to count.

Sacrifice and meal offering You have not desired;
My ears You have opened;
Burnt offering and sin offering You have not required.
Then I said, “Behold, I come;
In the scroll of the book it is written of me.
I delight to do Your will, O my God;
Your Law is within my heart.”

I just couldn’t not see how or why God would shut that door, so I just kept knocking on it. I kept sending messages asking if there had been any changes, yet every reply came back as no changes. From June until September I sought the Lord in my roller coaster emotional up and down what is going on and what do You want me to do kinda way and I just kept serving Him where ever and how ever He opened the door.

During this time I began to notice a consistent theme to the passages in Scripture that the Lord kept putting before me. Then when I made my regular door knocking call in September expecting another “no change” answer, I realized WHY the Lord had me in His Word in the places that He did when He did. This time the answer to my knocking was, “Yes. Are you available to meet next week? There has been some changes in the hiring process that we need to discuss.”

The Lord had spent the summer preparing my heart for these changes so that I would be able to receive them with excitement instead of discouragement or fear. Stepping into this new door under the terms required of me was a whole new ballgame for me. It was a complete leap of faith out of my comfort zone. It has taken me several deep breathes and Scripture recalls to make the phone calls and send the letters that I needed to send in order to walk through this door. Yet the Lord has been faithful!

I have proclaimed glad tidings of righteousness in the great congregation;
Behold, I will not restrain my lips,
O Lord, You know.
I have not hidden Your righteousness within my heart;
I have spoken of Your faithfulness and Your salvation;
I have not concealed Your lovingkindness and Your truth from the great congregation.

You, O Lord, will not withhold Your compassion from me;
Your lovingkindness and Your truth will continually preserve me.
For evils beyond number have surrounded me;
My iniquities have overtaken me, so that I am not able to see;
They are more numerous than the hairs of my head,
And my heart has failed me.

When ministry gets hard or scary, the Lord always takes me back to a day 15 years ago when I stood before a room full of hundreds of other women in Chattanooga, TN and declared to God that I would offer my body as a living sacrifice to Him. I wanted my life to tell His story and I would do that in any and every way that He allowed me. I would be faithful and obedient to Him and His Word no matter the cost.

Be pleased, O Lord, to deliver me;
Make haste, O Lord, to help me.
Let those be ashamed and humiliated together
Who seek my life to destroy it;
Let those be turned back and dishonored
Who delight in my hurt.
Let those be appalled because of their shame
Who say to me, “Aha, aha!”
Let all who seek You rejoice and be glad in You;
Let those who love Your salvation say continually,
“The Lord be magnified!”
Since I am afflicted and needy,
Let the Lord be mindful of me.
You are my help and my deliverer;
Do not delay, O my God.

Yes, at the age of forty years old the Lord once again met me in the Psalms. Through Psalm 40 He showed me how it was indeed His plan for me to serve Him. He was and is with me. He has blessed me with an open door for His Word in forty-five middle school and high school campuses and one college within four counties. I serve the Lord in North Alabama through the ministry of the Fellowship of Christian Athletes.

Walking through this door required me to step out in faith and trust the Lord to help me raise my own support. This is one of the hardest things that I have EVER done. It is a humbling experience. How very thankful I am for what the Lord is teaching me through this process and how very grateful I am for all those who say, “Yes, we are with you.”

“You will do well to send them on their journey in a manner worthy of God. For they have gone out for the sake of the name, accepting nothing from the Gentiles. Therefore we ought to support people like these, that we may be fellow workers for the truth.”
(3 John 1:6-8)

My current home team is made up of nineteen individuals, businesses, and churches. As I was delivering Christmas gifts to my ministry partners I sat down to share with one of them. I was telling him how excited I was of the success of the partnership between a particular church and school that the Lord had allowed me to establish and how I wished I could have gotten more churches and coaches to do what they were doing… And he just looked at me and smiled and reminded me that I needed to just be patient because I had only been at this for a couple of months. I was just getting started.

And He is right. This is just the beginning of what the Lord has in store.

But there it still remains… that sense of urgency. That stirring in my gut that says today is the day of salvation — the day of the Lord is near — be ready — make the most of your time for the days are evil — be about your Father’s business — the fields are white for harvest but the laborers are few — it’s appointed a man once to die and then the judgment — man is but a mere breathe — do not delay to enter the rest — had the owner of the house known what hour the thief was coming — today if you hear His voice…

So if today He is calling you to partner with me in this ministry know that I need you! I can only reach as far as my support allows me to reach. Within the past two months the Lord has allowed me to share His Word with over 240 female athletes and coaches. Yet, there are so very many more.

I have been able to be a part of Campus Huddles where in just those I have been able to visit I have seen over 400 students be reached with the gospel and loved on. I was also able to participate in our Decatur area Prayer Breakfast where almost 400 more students and coaches once again heard the gospel and where 45 prayed to receive Christ. I have also been able to meet with two other schools about starting Huddles on their campuses…

All because of nineteen individuals, businesses, and churches that said Yes, we want to be a part of your team.

I rejoice over all that the Lord has allowed me to reach in such a short amount of time. Yet there are so many more. There is so much to be done and to do and the time is indeed now.

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Join Nicole’s team: Be A Ministry Partner

See what’s going on in all eight counties through all of our FCA staff here: December 2016 NWNAL FCA Newsletter

Are you looking for a church home? Check out one of my ministry partners!

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When Love Languages Collide

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In the early years of our marriage my husband and I went through Gary Chapman’s 5 Love Languages study. We watched the videos, read the book, and took the test. We discovered that his love languages were small gifts and quality time and mine were words of affirmation and physical touch. Then several years ago we took the online Myers-Briggs personality tests just for fun and we learned that I’m an introvert and he’s an extrovert. I’m also ADD and he’s more OCD. Our love languages and personalities are complete opposite. This makes for an interesting life together.

Over the last seventeen years we have learned a few things that were a cause of tension in our marriage and we have learned some simple solutions that have helped tremendously. My husbands extrovert self comes into a gathering immediately connecting. Then when his extrovert cup runneth over, he is ready to leave the gathering and go decompress from it all. My introvert self takes a while to get comfortable enough in a gathering to start connecting.

Before we realized this about ourselves we would end up in a “discussion” over the time to leave a gathering. The issue being that by the time I was actually comfortable enough to stay, he had done had all he could stand and was ready to leave.  After seventeen years we have discovered that the best way to handle this is to drive separately or if that is not possible we now better understand the “Are you ready to go?” question.

Marriage is such an unraveling of mystery… and not just of the person you are married to, but of yourself as well.

“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

Ephesians 5:31-33

Sometimes in the unraveling of this mystery love languages and personalities collide. We have a joke between us on the hard days, my husband will look at me and say, “my OCD and your ADD are not playing well together today.” On those days we know we need to add a little personal space and grace and the day goes much better. Usually these days come as a result of added stresses and lack of sleep… they are not caused by a lack of love for one another.

When love languages collide it can FEEL worse. We are very involved in life. We actually had to get a family calendar app so that we all could keep up with what was going on where and when. When life gets busy the quality time and small gifts love tank starts to get empty. This can lead to a lack of affirming words that cause the words of affirmation love tank to get empty or even feel attacked which causes a withdrawal which leads to lack of physical touch which causes an even emptier tank. This collision can lead to a downward spiral of doubt and despair.

This spiral will continue until someone is willing to make a deposit in the others tank even though they do not FEEL like it.

My husband and I were in a funk a few weeks ago. Then out of the blue he sends me a text with words of affirmation. DEPOSIT! Then a few days later I brought home a few small gifts for him. DEPOSIT! Then I got the grand idea to skip Wednesday night church and have a date night. I took the kids to youth group and came home and we went out alone. Quality time (check).  Physical Touch (check). DOUBLE DEPOSIT!

Sometimes life’s circumstances makes these deposits hard. My words of affirmation and physical touch tank lost three depositors this past year and so did my husband’s quality time and small gifts. You see these tanks are not just filled by each other. Our parents, grandparents, siblings, and children also make deposits into our tanks. One of the things of marriage is that we are so close in proximity and bond we experience the most “reality” of the love tank emptiness. However, we are also the most easily available to refill the supply.

Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.”

Genesis 2:18

When our tanks start to get empty it’s like they become an empty well that echoes back to you. What happens so often is that the enemy of our souls recognizes when they are getting empty and he begins speaking his lies into that emptiness and his lies echo back to us and we think they are our own thoughts. He knows what lies to use to have the most effect in the shortest amount of time. He knows what your struggles and weaknesses are and he is just waiting for an opportunity to exploit them. This is why a relationship with Christ is vital.

Jesus said to her, “Everyone who drinks of this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again. The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.”

John 4:13-14

Apart from Christ people will never be able to keep our love tanks filled, no matter how hard they try. When our well begins to run dry, it is the Living Water that springs up. It is the Word of our Creator God and the presence of His Holy Spirit that will fill us so that the lies of the enemy can do no more than just echo for a brief moment. It His love being poured out on us and springing up within us that will fill us to the level that we can step out in obedience of faith and make a deposit in another’s tank even when and especially when we don’t feel like it.

So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him.

1 John 4:16

The enemy of our souls wants our love tanks empty so that his lies will echo all the louder. He wants it so void that he echoes so loudly that he drowns out our own thoughts and replaces them with his own. He wants us completely dependent on people to keep our tank filled because he knows people will fail us. The love of God however will not… It is in fact the love of God that gives us the strength to love others.

God wants to use us to be His vessels to pour His love into others. I believe that He wants that pouring to start at home. It only takes one person who is willing to drop their bucket into the well of Living Water and allow the love of God within to stop the downward spiral.

Do you need to be that one today?

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Discover your love language: Love Language Test

Take the personality test: MBTI online