Now concerning the things about which you wrote, it is good for a man not to touch a woman. But because of immoralities, each man is to have his own wife, and each woman is to have her own husband. The husband must fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.

1 Corinthians 7:1-4

I cannot tell you the times I have heard this passage of Scripture used as a tool of manipulation and control. It seems that many see this passage and all they see is “The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does”.

Some men read this and see, my wife is here to meet my sexual needs whenever I say so. She has no right to ever tell me no. I am the boss. 

Some women read this and see, what? this is my body and no one owns it but me… ever!

Both completely miss the entire point of this passage and the absolute breathtaking proof of true Christian liberation it contains because they do not put it into context.

This passage of Scripture was written when women were considered no more valuable than the sheep in the barn. They had no voice. They had no power. They had no freedom. They were bought and sold and thrown out. The sad thing is, that in many, many, many places in this world still to this day… that has not changed.

However, where Christ reigns, freedom reigns.

What this passage of Scripture really shouts is equality.

…each man is to have his own wife, and each woman is to have her own husband. The husband must fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.

Here in Christ, Paul states to the men of the church. Do you see this woman, this woman you call Wife. You belong to her and to her alone. This woman who from years past and for years to come is seen as nothing more than a tool of gratification in so many minds and nations of the world… this woman, this woman that you call Wife, has authority over your body, you belong to her just as much as she belongs to you.

Never, ever, was this even conceivable apart from the christian liberation found in Jesus Christ. That a husband was to be faithful to his wife, because his body belonged to her and her alone. Never before, was a woman lifted to such a level of respect and esteemed so highly as a wife and wife alone.

Christ takes the life of womanhood and lifts it up out from under the feet of man and places her back by his rightful side.

Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; and let them rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over the cattle and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.” God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. God blessed them; and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth, and subdue it; and rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over every living thing that moves on the earth.”

Genesis 1:26-28

In this day, the enemy of the cross and of our souls wants us to believe that Christianity is condemning and controlling and condescending to modern womanhood. That is the lie. The lie from the very depths of the pits of hell.

The truth is that in Christ and in Christ alone is true womanhood found and all the beautiful freedom that it contains.

One of the struggles of being a writer and being a woman that has chosen to lay her life out there for the world to see… is how much do I let you see of the lives of the others in my life. I don’t have the sovereign right to reveal the lives of others as I do what I reveal of myself, and this one concerns my kid… it could embarrass her… but I decided I am sharing it anyway.

The oldest of my womb is now almost twelve years old. She’s my sixth grader. My firstborn. My baby…

That precious little one that screamed bloody murder that night… that precious one that did not sleep for over two years… that precious one that I loved before I ever saw her. I cried when we moved last summer and I found her kindergarten writings. I cried this fall in the middle of Academy when my husband measured her foot and her shoe size has outnumbered mine. He looked at me and said, “that baby’s gone!”

As I  have watch this beautiful baby become a lovely lady I am filled with such hope and fear and sadness and joy all at the same time. This mother stuff is a trip. A glorious, terrifying, beautiful trip.

Last weekend I saw my daughter blossom in more ways than one… I saw her handle a lie.. and I saw her handle the truth… I saw her handle herself with value. I watched her in awe.

I heard this young woman speak Biblical truth to a first time met peer when she learned that they were being fed a lie. I saw her stand firm in the face of opposition and hold her Savior’s ground with strength and kindness and bold confidence.

Then last Sunday when a young man whom my husband and I had realized she was quite starry eyed over asked her about being his girlfriend… her response was simply… I like you, but you have to talk to my Dad.

She told this young man, I have value. I am precious in someone’s sight and you can’t have me unless they say its okay.

This young man, only a year older than she, manned up. He sent my husband a text right then… he didn’t beat around the bush… he didn’t try to pressure her into making a decision without the permission of her father. He just simply met the expectation she had set.

My husband responded to him and told him that he would meet with him face to face.

Of course this is one of the times that I have fallen in love with my husband all over again as he stood as the protector of our daughter. Here was this young man… who showed himself to be a young man by his respect for our daughter… and my husband chose to speak to him as a young man. He asked him what his definition of “girlfriend” was… and then he proceeded to share with him what the boundaries of this “relationship” would be. Then our daughter rode home from church with her Dad… and he talked Daddy to Daughter with her. As he told me some of what he shared… he said, I might have shared more information than is really required at this time, but they grow up so fast… I don’t want to turn around and realize I missed telling her.

Have I ever mentioned how much I love this man?

Now neither of us are really quite ready for our baby to have a “boyfriend” I would much rather prefer only friends until one day they realize this friend is the one. I don’t like dating, especially in such a way that you really are just practicing for divorce. I am more a proponent of “courting” and this young man has been raised to think in the same way. So here we go, we’ll take it one baby step at a time… even though “that baby’s gone“

Today my two youngest girls will have their full dress rehearsal for the College Street Players production of Willy Wonka. Yesterday was my first opportunity to see the show in full run through. Up to yesterday I had only had the opportunity to view the scenes my girls were rehearsing, but last night the entire cast was able to sit and be the “audience” for the run show dress rehearsal.

So just as I do anything I see with my eyes or hear with my ears I began filtering the production through my biblical understanding.

The play begins with giving the viewer a clear picture of the poverty of the bucket family according to worldly measures… but you also see the contentment in this family as they place their true wealth not in worldly gain, but in their family and love and respect for one another.

If we have food and covering,

with these we shall be content.

1 Timothy 6:8

As the play unfolds you will also see that no matter what disappointments or opportunities comes the Bucket’s way, they continue to lovingly remind one another to focus on the riches of family and they choose to rejoice in what they have instead of wollering in the misery of what they do not have. The character of the family is not based on accumulating more… their decisions are not based on their love of money, but on their love for one another.

Make sure that your character is free from the love of money,

being content with what you have;

for He Himself has said,

“I will never desert you, nor will I ever forsake you,”

Hebrews 13:5

One of the key songs in this production of Willy Wonka is the Bucket family motto and we hear them sing, “think positive…”  Now I am not a proponent of the whole positive thinking movement. I don’t believe we can think something into happening to fulfill our own selfish desires. I don’t buy into the name it and claim it of popular hype in christendom… but I do believe that we must cast down any thought that is not in accord with the Word of God (2 Corinthians 10:5) and we are to dwell on the truths of God and not the lies of the world.

Finally, brethren, whatever is true,

whatever is honorable, whatever is right,

whatever is pure, whatever is lovely,

whatever is of good repute,

if there is any excellence

and if anything worthy of praise,

dwell on these things.

Philippians 4:8

One of my favorite scenes in the play is at the Candy Man’s Store. You see, Charlie Bucket visits the Candy Man’s store quite often, the Candy Man know Charlie… he has watched him and he has seen the heart of this young boy. He has watched as Charlie has proven himself to be a young man of moral character. What Charlie does not know is that the Candy Man is the Willy Wonka…

Now as we watch Charlie’s hope begin to waver as he watches one kid after another reveal their golden ticket to the world we see the “Candy Man” ask Charlie to retrieve something for him… and then we see the “Candy Man” offer Charlie the newest greatest Wonka Bar… and then we see him encourage Charlie to go ahead and have a bite now… and before Charlie opens it we hear him sing his Bucket family motto as he digs down deep and hopes against hope that maybe, just maybe, this time he will peal back the layers of paper and discover a beautiful golden ticket wrapped around that chocolate bar.

Much to his amazement… there it is! He has the last Golden Ticket! But it was not the power of positive thinking that delivered that ticket into his hands… it was the intervention of the one who knew his heart and had the power and authority to put that ticket in his hands.

Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above,

coming down from the Father of lights, 

with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow.

James 1:17

As you meet Charlie you also meet the other golden ticket discoverers. You will meet them one by one. Oh my, let me tell you they are a handful. I could break down the character of each of these, but I believe they will be clearly portrayed in the show. Selfishness, disrespect, greediness, unruliness, its just plain nasty and nasty is always easy to spot. The bottom line is that these characters are kids that have had their fleshly desires fed and fed and fed and fed. Their is no restraint given to them or expected of them.

There is a clear distinction between the character and integrity of the Bucket family as opposed to the families of these other Golden Ticket holders.

The one who is taught the word is to share all good things with the one who teaches him. Do not be deceived,God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, this he will also reap. For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life. Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary. So then, while we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, and especially to those who are of the household of the faith.

Galatians 6:6-10

In the play we child after child show their true colors more and more as they are faced with the objects of their desire… Their greatest temptation is faced before all of them and they succumb every time… even Charlie.

Charlie faces the fizzy lifting drink… could the object of Charlie’s desire be to be lifted up out of poverty? Could it be that he desires to have the freedom of provision that he sees so many others abusing? I think maybe so… yet here lies the test… how will Charlie seek the fulfillment of this desire?

As we see the fizzy lifting drink temptation of Charlie… we see that it is a test placed before him by Willy Wonka himself. What on earth would Charlie do when or if he chooses to fulfill a legitimate desire in an illegitimate way? What would he do if he failed?

Would he hide it?

Would he deny it?

Would he lie about it?

Or would he own it and reveal it and confess it and ask forgiveness for it?

As the play progresses you will see that these children do eventually reap what they have sown… Charlie reaps an eternal inheritance that can be passed from one generation to the next, one that he can share with the world, and he gets an even larger family as he now is entrusted with the care of Mr Wonka’s beloved Oompa Loompas… and well the others get all they are going to get in this life, a lifetime supply of chocolate.

 Truly I say to you, they have their reward in full.

Matthew 6:2

I highly recommend coming to see the College Street Players production of Willy Wonka (Not just because my children are in it) but because you will see the picture of a family that holds on to hope as they face the trials of this life. You will see the contrast between a family that places its wealth in integrity, honesty, love, respect, and hope as opposed to families that place their wealth in the ability to meet the selfish desires of their flesh.

May we learn from the example of the Bucket family and choose to be content with what we have and yet still hold on to the hope of a better day ahead.

Not that I speak from want, for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am. I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need.

Philippians 4:10-12

I usually do not pay much attention to Lent. I was raised in a Southern Baptist environment. Lent was not even really ever a topic of conversation much less observed. With that in mind I have been doing a little online reading in the Catholic Encyclopedia.

The Teutonic word Lent, which we employ to denote the forty days’ fast preceding Easter, originally meant no more than the spring season.

Still it has been used from the Anglo-Saxon period to translate the more significant Latin term quadragesima (French carême, Italian quaresima,Spanish cuaresma), meaning the “forty days”, or more literally the “fortieth day”. This in turn imitated the Greek name for Lent, tessarakoste(fortieth), a word formed on the analogy of Pentecost (pentekoste), which last was in use for the Jewish festival before New Testament times. This etymology, as we shall see, is of some little importance in explaining the early developments of the Easter fast.

But the best modern scholars are almost unanimous in rejecting this view, for in the existing remains of the first three centuries we find both considerable diversity of practice regarding the fast before Easter and also a gradual process of development in the matter of its duration. The passage of primary importance is one quoted by Eusebius (Church History V.24) from a letter of St. Irenaeus to Pope Victor in connection with the Easter controversy. There Irenaeus says that there is not only a controversy about the time of keeping Easter but also regarding the preliminary fast. “For”, he continues, “some think they ought to fast for one day, others for two days, and others even for several, while others reckon forty hours both of day and night to their fast“. He also urges that this variety of usage is of ancient date, which implies that there could have been no Apostolic tradition on the subject. Rufinus, who translated Eusebius into Latin towards the close of the fourth century, seems so to have punctuated this passage as to make Irenaeus say that some people fasted for forty days. Formerly some difference of opinion existed as to the proper reading, but modern criticism (e.g., in the edition of Schwartz commissioned by the Berlin Academy) pronounces strongly in favor of the text translated above. We may then fairly conclude that Irenaeus about the year 190 knew nothing of any Easter fast of forty days.

This is just a little info… and from it we can see that Lent is a tradition… and that is it. It is not required, nor requested, by our LORD God to observe it… not in history… not in His Word. With that in mind, those who choose not to observe it have no need to concern themselves with whether or not they are shirking from any religious deed that would bring pleasure to our Savior.

Another interesting thing I read from the Catholic Encyclopedia…

But the ordinary rule on fasting days was to take but one meal a day and that only in the evening, while meat and, in the early centuries, wine were entirely forbidden. During Holy Week, or at least on Good Friday it was common to enjoin the xerophagiæ, i.e., a diet of dry food, bread, salt, and vegetables.

Moreover, at a somewhat later date, Bede tells us of Bishop Cedda, that during Lent he took only one meal a day consisting of “a little bread, a hen’s egg, and a little milk mixed with water” (Church History III.23), while Theodulphus of Orleans in the eighth century regarded abstinence from eggs, cheese, and fish as a mark of exceptional virtue. None the less St. Gregory writing to St. Augustine of England laid down the rule, “We abstain from flesh meat, and from all things that come from flesh, as milk, cheese, and eggs.” This decision was afterwards enshrined in the “Corpus Juris”, and must be regarded as the common law of the Church. Still exceptions were admitted, and dispensations to eat “lacticinia” were often granted upon condition of making a contribution to some pious work. These dispensations were known in Germany as Butterbriefe, and severalchurches are said to have been partly built by the proceeds of such exceptions. One of the steeples of Rouen cathedral was for this reason formerly known as the Butter Tower. This general prohibition of eggs and milk during Lent is perpetuated in the popular custom of blessing or making gifts of eggs at Easter,

Well, there. Now you know a reason why we share eggs at Easter 🙂

On a more serious note, as I pondered the fast, and read “But the ordinary rule on fasting days was to take but one meal a day and that only in the evening,…” I thought how very much sense that did make. Fasting only at the evening meal. If we fast for breakfast or lunch… we fast knowing that the next meal is coming soon… but if we fast our evening meal we fast knowing that we will go to bed hungry. This fast seems truer to me.

Now as I pondered whether or not I would personally observe Lent this year I first thought of foods I could give up for the coming forty days… As I thought food, I also thought, oooo I wonder how much weight I will lose before Easter if I fast bread, sugar, etc.

Ugh! Notice that the fast now became about me… not my Lord.

Then I thought I will give up coffee for Lent… and my husband shook his head and said, Uh, no. He does have to live with me for the next forty days and I am not so sure if sacrificing his sanity and my girls is really what would lead to a time of lifting up my Jesus.

Then I thought, God what have me and You been going round and round about?

I knew it was my health, specifically exercising. Yet getting down to the root of the matter it was excuses. I have always had a very good excuse for not exercising. I feel terrible. I am tired. I have no time.

I have decided to observe Lent this year… and although traditionally, the fast of Lent is to fast from a food, I am fasting from excuses.

This morning I got up, and yes, I felt horrible. I can’t breathe due to nasal congestion and cough… and I almost began my excuse. However I stopped. Instead of making an excuse because I could not jump into a Tae Bo routine… I said to my God, OK. I know I can’t make it through a 3o minute high impact workout yet, but I can stretch.

So this morning I began with stretches instead of excuses. 🙂

Then as Lent comes to a close I am seriously considering fasting my evening meal the week of Easter…

I will let you know.

The Lord utters His voice before His army;
Surely His camp is very great,
For strong is he who carries out His word.
The day of the Lord is indeed great and very awesome,
And who can endure it?
“Yet even now,” declares the Lord,
“Return to Me with all your heart,
And with fasting, weeping and mourning;
And rend your heart and not your garments.”
Now return to the Lord your God,
For He is gracious and compassionate,
Slow to anger, abounding in lovingkindness
And relenting of evil.

Joel 2:11-13