That Baby’s Gone

confessions

 

One of the struggles of being a writer and being a woman that has chosen to lay her life out there for the world to see… is how much do I let you see of the lives of the others in my life. I don’t have the sovereign right to reveal the lives of others as I do what I reveal of myself, and this one concerns my kid… it could embarrass her… but I decided I am sharing it anyway.

The oldest of my womb is now almost twelve years old. She’s my sixth grader. My firstborn. My baby…

shelby's birth

 

That precious little one that screamed bloody murder that night… that precious one that did not sleep for over two years… that precious one that I loved before I ever saw her. I cried when we moved last summer and I found her kindergarten writings. I cried this fall in the middle of Academy when my husband measured her foot and her shoe size has outnumbered mine. He looked at me and said, “that baby’s gone!

shelby wonka

As I  have watch this beautiful baby become a lovely lady I am filled with such hope and fear and sadness and joy all at the same time. This mother stuff is a trip. A glorious, terrifying, beautiful trip.

Last weekend I saw my daughter blossom in more ways than one… I saw her handle a lie.. and I saw her handle the truth… I saw her handle herself with value. I watched her in awe.

I heard this young woman speak Biblical truth to a first time met peer when she learned that they were being fed a lie. I saw her stand firm in the face of opposition and hold her Savior’s ground with strength and kindness and bold confidence.

Then last Sunday when a young man whom my husband and I had realized she was quite starry eyed over asked her about being his girlfriend… her response was simply… I like you, but you have to talk to my Dad.

She told this young man, I have value. I am precious in someone’s sight and you can’t have me unless they say its okay.

This young man, only a year older than she, manned up. He sent my husband a text right then… he didn’t beat around the bush… he didn’t try to pressure her into making a decision without the permission of her father. He just simply met the expectation she had set.

My husband responded to him and told him that he would meet with him face to face.

Of course this is one of the times that I have fallen in love with my husband all over again as he stood as the protector of our daughter. Here was this young man… who showed himself to be a young man by his respect for our daughter… and my husband chose to speak to him as a young man. He asked him what his definition of “girlfriend” was… and then he proceeded to share with him what the boundaries of this “relationship” would be. Then our daughter rode home from church with her Dad… and he talked Daddy to Daughter with her. As he told me some of what he shared… he said, I might have shared more information than is really required at this time, but they grow up so fast… I don’t want to turn around and realize I missed telling her.

Have I ever mentioned how much I love this man?

Now neither of us are really quite ready for our baby to have a “boyfriend” I would much rather prefer only friends until one day they realize this friend is the one. I don’t like dating, especially in such a way that you really are just practicing for divorce. I am more a proponent of “courting” and this young man has been raised to think in the same way. So here we go, we’ll take it one baby step at a time… even though “that baby’s gone

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