>There is something about a rainy Sunday that is so calming. It’s days like this that I wish we had a open building with a tin roof with a hammock hanging close to the opening yet still under the shelter of the roof…

This Sunday begins a new time in life. A new church year, a new class… for both me and my husband. We have shared our Sunday morning class for the past 10 years, either as attenders or teachers. This season I am teaching one class, the Precept study, Spiritual Gifts, and he is attending an all men’s class. He has said today that he very much enjoyed the class.
I love couple classes, but I agree that there also are times that certain needs cannot be met in a couple’s class that can be met in an all men’s or all women’s class. It’s also good to be able to switch up your class in order to get to know more of the people in your church. I am glad that our church has chosen to take the steps that we have in order to open the door to do exactly that.

[and yes if you live in my area this is an official invite to join me in worship at Shiloh 🙂 if I have even just managed to make you a little bit curious about this man our Biblebelt South calls Jesus, then come and allow me to introduce Him to you as I know Him… it would be my pleasure]

So this rainy Sunday has been a good day. We enjoyed a wonderful time of fellowship with other believers. Our pastor was rushed to the hospital in the early morning with a possible appendicitis, but he is good now, no appendicitis. In the meantime our youth minister brought an excellent message on how it is time for the church- me, us, you, to live differently.

It reminded me of another quote from Dr Martin Luther King Jr:

For so many Christians, Christianity, is a Sunday activity having no relevancy for Monday and the church is little more than a secular social club having a thin veneer of religiousity. Jesus is an ancient symbol whom we do the honor of calling Christ, and yet his Lordship is neither affirmed nor acknowledged by our substanceless lives… We need to pledge ourselves anew to the cause of Christ. We must recapture the spirit of the early church. Wherever the early Christians went, they made a triumphant witness for Christ. Whether on the village streets or in the city jails, they daringly proclaimed the good news of the gospel. Their reward for this audacious witness was often the excrutiating agony of a lion’s den or the poignant pain of a chopping block, but they continued in the faith that they had discovered a cause so great and had been transformed by a Saviour so divine that even death was not too great a sacrifice… Where is that kind of fervour today? Where is that kind of daring, revolutionary commitment to Christ today? Is it hidden behind smoke screens and altars? Is it buried in a grace called respectability? Is it inextricably bound with nameless status quos and imprisoned within cells of stagnant mores? This devotion must again be released. Christ must once more be enthroned in or lives.    

So as I sit here in the comfort of my home and listen to the rain fall, and dream of listening to it rain on a tin roof while I lay in a hammock and watch it fall, I also contemplate the reality that I am too comfortable and I am indeed reaching the point that I am uncomfortable in my comfort and I have an ever increasing longing to be one who is called strange, even a fool, by the world because I “am intoxicated with the wine of God’s grace” as I boldly proclaim the gospel of my God.

Please watch this video before you read the rest of the post:
What would you do?

Well, I discovered what I would do as I was in New Orleans. I discovered that I would walk by, not making eye contact. I was more brave with my husband and would offer a smile, but my heart was gripped with the “what if they approach me?”

There is one instance in particular that is seared in my brain and heart forever now. When my husband was in meetings I was on my own. I was not comfortable at all on these streets without his presence beside me. So as I ventured out one day to get lunch I thought I would be brave enough to go past the Arby’s that was right next to our hotel.

I ventured out, but I ventured out in fear. Trying not to make eye contact with anyone. (My shoulders sag now in defeat as I remember that I was to be strong and courageous.) There was one woman that was sitting up against a building shoeless. As I walked past she asked me for money for shoes. I kept walking as though I never heard her. I did not even acknowledge her existence.

How very cruel of me.

I could use the excuse that I was a woman alone on the streets of New Orleans following my husbands instructions to be careful… but that just doesn’t seem to justify the situation in any way does it? I could use the excuse of email after email that claims that rapist and murderers and thieves use the “female in distress” tactic to lure in victims, but even this does not make me feel any better about my action… or rather my lack of action.

What I wished I would have done is to have sat down against the wall with this obviously broken woman and asked her what her story was. I wish I would have looked this woman in the eyes and showed her compassion. I wish I would have taken the time and opportunity to discover who she was. How did she end up her on this street, with no shoes, asking strangers for money?

Oh how I regret that I did not do this.

She asked for shoes… and I should have told her of the shoes of the gospel of peace.

Apparently my beautiful feet were left in the comfort zone of my hotel room. My feet were not beautiful at all on these streets of New Orleans. I left my room not with the prayer of  “God use me today to share your good news.”  I left my room with the only thought of “God, let me get something to eat and make my way safely back to my room.” 

God sometimes seems to put us in the vise, and then He tightens it and tightens it more, until we think, in the pain of His sovereign squeeze, “What’s He trying to do to me?” We walk closer to Him and even closer to Him. We don’t see how we could walk any closer, but still more tests come, one on top of another.

That’s where Elijah is, but he doesn’t waver. He stands tall and silent in the shadow of God, grounded in faith, confident of his Lord’s power. That’s humility at its best. He doesn’t question God. He doesn’t fall apart at the seams. He doesn’t lose control.
~ Swindoll

If you walk with the Lord long enough, you will discover that His tests often come back-to-back. Or perhaps it would be even more accurate to say back to back to back to back to back. Usually, His preparatory tests don’t stop with one or two. They multiply. And as soon as you climb out of one crucible thinking, “Okay, I made it through that one,” you’re plunged into another, where the flame is even hotter.
Crucibles create Christlikeness.
~ Swindoll

I don’t know about you, but I have come to realize that I usually attempt to determine whether or not God is pleased with me according to what “good” things are happening in my life.

If I am going through test after test and trial after trial I tend to feel as though I am doing something wrong, not pleasing God in some area of my life, that I am just not getting the point.

I have a tendency to judge my own life the way Job’s friends judged his. “Well there must be some sin that God is trying to get me to confess, some sin that is separating me from Him so he’s putting me through this, something in my flesh that must be crucified, something I am blind to, and He must be trying to open my eyes…”

So reading these quotes by such a great man of faith as Chuck Swindoll, well it helps. These words shared by Swindoll are really truths that I already know, but somehow in the midst of the vise, the test, I forget them.

This is why God tells us to not forsake the assembly (Hebrews 10:24-25). We need each other, we need to encourage each other, we need to surround ourselves with a cloud of witnesses to the truth of God and the solid foundation of His Word, and to build up one another’s faith. We need a Aaron and a Hur to hold up our arms when we grow weary in this battle of life (Exodus 17:12).

A little poem I just penned…

Sometimes the fire is to burn off the dross of sin,
sometimes the fire is to purify the silver within,
but every time it is God who controls the flame,
so no matter the force of the furnace the fire will not be in vain,
the test we might not understand,
the trial may make no sense to man,
but God is He who tightens the vice,
and in His grip we must not lose sight,
that our eyes on Christ must always be fixed,
for this is the reason for our own crucifix,
to take up our cross and follow Him, 
to be conformed to the image of the One who conquered death and sin
let us not view our new life through old eyes of flesh
let us walk by the Spirit that we now in Christ possess
let us not grow weary of doing good
nor prejudge God when He doesn’t do what we think He should

>Forgiveness.
This is where we can see the true picture of a believer.
Do you have the ability, even the desire, to forgive another. 

In our humanness we want a limit. We want to be able to say:
“You’ve crossed the line”
“You’ve gone to far”
“I’ve had it up to here”
“That’s the final straw”

What I love here in Matthew 18 as Jesus answers Peter question on a forgiveness limit is that Jesus gives him a limit.
Why?
What is it about this limit of seventy times seven?

When we were potty training our girls we had a sticker chart. The chart had set of boxes. There was a beginning and an end to the chart. The stickers had a limit. Every time our girls went to the potty they got a sticker. The goal of course was to be a pee-peeing in the potty pro by the time the sticker chart had reached its limit.
The point of this potty sticker chart was to get our girls in the habit of going to the bathroom. We didn’t wait for the girls to “feel” like they had to go to the potty. We made them go whether they felt like it or not.
Do you know that neither of our girls reached that end limit. Both of them had made going to the potty a habit of their life before they ever reached the sticker limit.

This I believe is the point of Jesus’s limit.

“…forgiveness is not a matter of quantity, but of quality. A man cannot forgive up to four hundred and ninety times without forgiveness becoming a part of the habit structure of his being. Forgiveness is not an occasional act; it is a permanent attitude.” ~ MLK Jr

So precious one, who are you struggling to forgive?
How about making yourself a Forgiveness Chart for whoever that person is. Give your chart 490 boxes. Everytime you ask God to help you forgive this person, put a sticker in a box. Don’t wait until you “feel” like forgiving them, just do it, say it, ask God to help you obey His Word, whether you feel like it or not.

Then also, make a Forgiveness Chart and put your name on it. Give your chart 490 boxes. Everytime you ask God to forgive you, put a sticker in a box. This will help you keep things in perspective.

Here’s the thing… I will almost bet that you won’t finish either one of those charts before forgiveness becomes a part of your character. Practice will make perfect. You will learn to forgive as you have been forgiven.

>God is neither hardhearted nor softminded. He is toughminded enough to transcend the world; he is tenderhearted enough to live in it. He does not leave us alone in our agonies and struggles. He seeks us in dark places and suffers with us and for us in our tragic prodigality.
At times we need to know that the Lord is a God of justice. When slumbering giants of injustice emerge in the earth, we need to know that there is a God of power who can cut them down like the grass and leave them withering like the green herb. When our most tireless efforts fail to stop the surging sweep of oppression, we need to know that in this universe is a God whose matchless strength is a fit contrast to the sordid weakness of man.
But there are also times when we need to know that God possesses love and mercy. When we are staggered by the chilly winds of adversity and battered by the raging storms of disappointment and when through our folly and sin we stray into some destructive far country and are frustrated because of a strange feeling of homesickness, we need to know that there is Someone who loves us, cares for us, understands us, and will give us another chance.
When days grow dark and nights grow dreary, we can be thankful that our God combines in his nature a creative synthesis of love and justice which will lead us through life’s dark valleys and into sunlit pathways of hope and fulfilment.
— from Strength to Love by Martin Luther King Jr

So many times people try to only pick one side of God. When someone has hurt us we want Him to be a God who deals with that person, but when we are the one who has done the hurting we want a God of mercy. I agree with Mr. King, I am thankful our God is both toughminded and tenderhearted. Toughminded enough to give us truth and discipline but tenderhearted enough to give us a second chance when we have went away from that truth.
This is the example that Jesus gave us when he came to reveal God to us in the flesh.

Jesus was toughminded. He could not be “handled” no matter how hard the people tried. He could not be influenced or swayed or deceived or stumped. He could not be emotionally manipulated or intimidated by popular opinion. He used his mind. He knew how to think. He knew truth and the lie can never stand up against the truth.

Jesus was also tenderhearted enough that he felt compassion for all. He didn’t use His knowledge to condemn another or beat them further down into their sin. He didn’t see Himself as more superior and walk over the one who was dead in their sin. Jesus rolled up His sleeves and got right down in the muck of another’s life in order to use His tough mind to pull them up.

We are called as believers to be “shrewd as serpents and innocent as doves” (Matthew 10:16), “to be wise in what is good and innocent in what is evil.” (Romans 16:19) We too must be both toughminded and tenderhearted. Our minds must be strong enough to hold up against all the lies of the enemy and all the philosophies and false doctrines of man. Yet we must also be able to give compassion (not pity) and mercy and grace to those who in their soft mind and weakness have become a prey.

I believe this can only be accomplished in and through Christ in us. We have not the ability to do this on our own… we will either be tenderhearted with no toughmind, allowing all sorts of sin and corruption with no rebuke, calling it tolerance or even love. Or we will be only toughminded and will love not. We will be cold and heartless and show no compassion to those who live below our standard.

As I parent my children I can see the need for both the tenderheart and toughmind. I must be toughminded so that I know how to lead them and set a standard and expect it to be kept. I have to be toughminded enough to not allow my children to “handle” me. My children will not control me by emotion. However, I also need to be tenderhearted with my children showing them love and mercy and grace. They need to know that they are loved because they are mine, not because they are perfect.

My parents use to tell me that they loved me with one hand and the other hand was for my backside when I got out of line. And it was true. I knew they loved me no matter what, but I also knew they would discipline me no matter what.

Hmmm how interesting it is that over and over as we discover the truths of the character of God we find the greatest illustrations of Him (other than Christ Himself) in the family, either through marriage or the raising of our children.

No wonder Satan works so hard to destroy and distort the family…

Well yesterday was my first experience with New Orleans.
I walked with my husband down the streets… some of them beautiful… some of them flat out terrifying and so very sad.

Yes I went down Bourbon Street.

I have never been to a city like this one. I usually feel rather safe wherever I am and I don’t scare very easily. Of course this has gotten me into trouble many times.

In my life I have ended up in many places I had no business being. What made it worse was that I was in these places with no protection or covering. I was indeed very foolish in my days of rebellion against my God.

I had actually planned to come to Mardi Gras once when in these days of rebellion. After walking down this street on the arm of my protective husband, I know that it was God’s intervention that stopped this visit. I believe my plan was actually to come to the Mardi Gras after I met my husband, it was meeting him that stopped that road trip. I had him on my mind, not Mardi Gras.

I shudder to think of what might have happened had I been so foolish to have come to this place during that time as a 21 year old woman, who would have at that time no doubt been intoxicated and blind, and without the covering of God, or my father, or a husband.

I thank God for His times of divine intervention.

We made it to Bourbon Street and my husband looked at me and said “Are you ready?” My hands began to sweat immediately and my stomach went in to knots. But yes I was ready.

The smell was different on this street, my husband described it as a mix of urine and vomit, like the smell of the nastiest night club bathroom you had ever been in… and yes that is how the entire street smelled. We both know that smell well from our own days of rebellion against God and His ways.

There was a sense of imminent danger, and the feeling of knowing that this was a place of evil.

I walked with a death grip on my husbands hand. Yet I walked with confidence and assurance because I had two of my greatest protectors with me, my God and my husband.

This was a moment that I was reminded of one of the reasons I love my husband.

He sets his guard around me as if he is my own personal body guard, and he is. When I am on the arm of my husband I truly do not worry, no matter what is going on around me. I knew someone would have to go through him to get to me and he walks with me on his arm in a such a way that says, “She is mine, you touch her, or say or do anything out of the way to her to hurt her in any way and I will kill you.”

This is also the way I always felt when I went somewhere with my earthly father. I knew if I was with my Daddy, all would be fine. I still feel that way when with him.

I have been blessed with protection.

As I walked down this street and saw these women, sitting in the doorways, barely clothed, my first thought went to my flesh of fear of my husband seeing them and desiring them over me. Hate and jealousy almost springing up over women who hadn’t even saw me or my husband yet.

Crazy? Yes…

Then as I walked, my heart quickly became heavy with sadness for these women… where were their protectors?

In my days of rebellion against God I shook off my protectors. I told my God and my earthly father (not out loud mind you, just in a spiritual sense, I never lost my fear of God nor my Daddy, I know this is what kept me in those days, my fear and underlying respect of them both) that I didn’t need them and I went my own way. It was the wrong way and I got hurt. I still bare the scars of this rebellion.

There were men walking up and down this street, but they were there to exploit these women, not protect them. They were here to use them and destroy them, not rescue them. Here was Satan walking in and amongst these men and women blinding them with drunken intoxication and lust of the flesh and the momentary pleasures of sin and binding them in heavier and heavier chains.

I looked at these men and these women and I knew that was once me. I know that could easily be me again if I do not stay under the protective arm of my God and my husband. I know this because as we turned off Bourbon Street and up another block, the beauty of New Orleans was seen.

The old buildings with the iron railings. The ferns on the balconies. The horse drawn carriages. The sound of street jazz music playing in the air.

Yes intoxicating.

How easy it would be to come in here on this street and have a glass of wine or mixed drink… then have another… and then find yourself back on Bourbon Street.

The devil knows what he is doing.

There was an entire street we walked down that was lined up with booth after booth of “psychics”. What was interesting about this was they were set up right outside the front door of a huge beautiful church building. Now I do not know if this is an active church or just a building now, but how very sad the sight was. It reminded me of the days of Ahaz that I studied in Isaiah and how the people brought the idols into the temple of God… and no one cared.

Oh church we must get busy. We can’t just keep living our lives behind our stained glass walls and pretending that there are not people out their in chains that need set free.

As we walked down these streets I wondered what would happen if I ran up and down these streets shouting “Come out of her, my people, so that you will not participate in her sins and receive of her plagues;…” (Rev 18:4)

Then I had to ask myself, if God really asked me to do that, would I obey?

>My girls and I walked to our Public Library this afternoon. I wanted to get a new book to read while I tag-a-long on my husband’s business trip to New Orleans. (I have never been to New Orleans so I am sure I will gather lots of interesting blogging material while I am there. So stay tuned 🙂

After spending close to an hour there looking through the book shelves I finally chose two books for the trip. I am almost embarrassed to admit that I never knew that Martin Luther King Jr had a book in publication. This is a man that I truly admire. So when I saw the book Strength to Love by Martin Luther King Jr, written in 1963, I had to grab it.

One of my constant prayers is that God would teach me to love as He loves. There have been people in my life that I have asked God to remove, but He always whispers in my heart, Nicole, if you can learn to love them, you can learn to love anyone.

If any man can shed some extra light on this subject of loving those that are not so nice to us and help me to learn to live in/with this kind of godly love Martin Luther King Jr should be able to.
I have only thumbed through this book and already I am floored by his words…

Let me share a passage of this book with you:

“I do not pretend to understand all of the ways of God or his particular timetable for grappling with evil. Perhaps if God dealt with evil in the overbearing way that we wish, he would defeat his ultimate purpose. We are responsible human beings, not blind automatons; persons, not puppets. By endowing us with freedom, God relinquished a measure of his own sovereignty and imposed certain limitations upon himself. If his children are free, they must do his will by a voluntary choice. Therefore, God cannot at the same time impose his will upon his children and also maintain his purpose for man. If through sheer omnipotence God were to defeat his purpose, he would express weakness rather than power. Power is the ability to fulfill purpose; action which defeats purpose is weakness.
God’s unwillingness to deal with evil with an overbearing immediacy does not mean that he is doing nothing. We weak and finite human beings are not alone in our quest for the triumph of righteousness. There is, as Matthew Arnold wrote, an ‘enduring power, not ourselves, which makes for righteousness.’
We must also remember that God does not forget his children who are the victims of evil forces. He gives us the interior resources to bear the burdens and tribulations of life. When we are in the darkness of some oppressive Egypt, God is a light unto our path. He imbues us with the strength needed to endure the ordeals of Egypt, and he gives us the courage and power to undertake the journey ahead. When the lamp of hope flickers and the candle of faith runs low, he restoreth our souls, giving us renewed vigor to carry on. He is with us not only in the noontime of fulfillment, but also in the midnight of despair.”  

Do you see why I cannot wait to get into this book? I am actually having to force myself now to put it down so that I do not have it read before we leave Sunday. I am already sure that my twitter will be rockin’ and my blogging will be abundant as I share all the lightbulb moments.

I also will be reading The Pursuit of God by A.W. Tozer this coming week. I am on edge waiting to dive into this book as well 🙂

My husband will be speaking at the conference and will be attending workshops during the day so I will have hours of uninterrupted time alone this week to spend studying the glorious Word of my God and reading these two books by some mighty men of God and writing my heart out about what all God is teaching me.

Then the rest of the time I will have the great joy of spending hours of uninterrupted time with my man wondering the streets of New Orleans 🙂

I will miss my girls, but they will be being happily spoiled rotten by their grandparents, so I shall not feel guilty about this time of absence from them. I am just going to enjoy the week with my God and with my Husband. I look forward to spending this week growing closer to them both and learning to love them both more deeply…

Hmmmm and also wondering what doors for the Word my God might open for me while I am there to share the Good News of Christ.

>How often do we hear, “I’m just giving you a little constructive criticism… after all I am blah, blah, blah”
Then we feel need to respond with, “well I don’t mind constructive criticism.” or “I know I need to be able to accept constructive criticism.”  

The more I think about this phrase, this act, well I have had a little issue here lately with this idea of “constructive criticism”. So I thought I might do a little bit of research on this term we so often use.

The word constructive means “building, beneficial to progress, inferential. (Now I had no clue what inferential meant so I had to look that up too, it means “a conclusion or presumption, concluded by reasoning or derived from evidence”)

The word criticism means “the act or judgment of a critic and a critic is one who appraises the merit of another’s work, usually in a negative evaluation and when one “criticizes” it is usually adversely.

Some of the synonyms for criticize are blame, censure, condemn, denounce, dis, dispraise, fault, knock, reprehend, come down hard on, find fault…

If we put the words constructive and criticism together according to there definitions and synonyms do we not have an oxymoron? Do not the two words actually contradict each other and defeat the other’s purpose?

Do you know there is only one place in the NAS translation that we can find the word criticize? (the word “criticism” was not there)

According to the Word of God it’s those who criticize that are proving themselves to be the one in error.

Is not criticism, someone setting themselves up as a superior because they have received the praises of man (or even just simply because they have a very high opinion of themselves and the way they do things ) and now they look at you and evaluate your creation, you work, your efforts according to their taste, style, and opinion? And if you do not measure up to them (according to them of course) then you are now considered inferior and your efforts lacking in their eyes.

The more I receive criticism, the more I hate it. Truthfully I had rather not share my work, not put forth my effort, if when I know I have given my best, or am trying my best on what knowledge and skill I currently possess, and then someone comes in and criticizes it and tears that down…
Oh is it not a death blow?

I watch the eyes of others as they receive this “constructive criticism” and there is nothing building up in their countenance. Criticism is not teaching. It is very different. We need to be sure we know the difference. Especially with our children and with our spouses and with anyone who sits under us as a learner in any way.

Believe it or not this term began to irritate me the most as I watched MasterChef with my family. These home cooks prepare these amazing meals that they are so very proud of, these are meals that I could not even imagine preparing myself because there were no boxes or cans of pre-put together ingredients.
They bring these dishes up with bright smiles of pride in what they have accomplished, it most likely is a dish that their friends and family have thoroughly enjoyed as a special gourmet meal, and they present them to these “judges”.
These judges then snarl their noses at this dish and pick around it and sniff it and roll their eyes and sometimes even dump this creative effort, this special work, in the trash.

I watched the faces of these cooks this year and my heart broke… and yet most of us (including me before this year) are sitting at home on our couches laughing our butts off at the destructive words coming from this judge toward this person who was so proud of what they had accomplished, to only be told it still was not good enough.
This cook then goes back to their cooking area completely broken down and humiliated and says something like, “I know I needed the “constructive criticism.”

I dare say “no, they didn’t.”

Let me share a few of the antonyms of the word criticize, they are extol, laud, praise…

Hmmm personally it seems to me that constructive praise would be much more building and beneficial to progress. I believe these cooks needed constructive praise not constructive condemning (remember condemn is a synonym for criticize).

I believe we all should have a high standard set for our lives. We should desire to be the best we can be in all things, but I believe we will get there faster through giving and receiving constructive praise, not constructive condemning. 

How does God tell us to build up? To appraise the work and efforts of another? To be beneficial to the progress of another?

Word of God speak…

>Yesterday was our first day back to school at the Vaughn Elementary Academy. My girls began there day with Bible Study/Quiet Time. This is to be the first thing they do every morning. This is also my number one reason for wanting to homeschool our children.

I had forgotten how wonderful our days of school are. I had forgotten how satisfying it is to teach my children in my lap the Scriptures of God (my Bekah at 7, still needs help). I had forgotten how breathtaking it was to peek into my Shelby’s room (my 10 year old) and see her digging into the Word of God on her own and loving it.

I had forgotten because this summer I allowed this to fall to the wayside…

I still had my quiet time, but I let them slide. I allowed them to go straight to the tv all summer long. I did so because I justified that my summer seemed so crazy that I needed every bit of morning I could get to keep my sanity and study what I knew I had to teach and to plan my lessons. What is funny (or sad) is that as I sit here now, I cannot think of one thing that I actually accomplished this summer. I can’t recall what it was about this summer that made it such a whirlwind… but still it seems as though it is just a blur.

My Sunday’s I remember. I remember what I have learned as I studied and I recall the lessons I have taught… but I cannot remember why this summer was so crazy.

There is no outside tangible thing that comes to mind… it must have just been an internal hurricane. Maybe it was the constant confusion crashes or the waves of worry or the dunes of doubt or the faith freak outs… probably all of the above. Maybe it was just simply that I was not being still and trusting my Jesus to calm the storm as much as I thought I was.

Maybe it was just that my focus was off completely, my priorities out of wack… again, most likely this was it.

You see I had forgotten that before I am a teacher to others… I am first a teacher to my children. I don’t want them to just see me doing my Bible study/quiet time I want to teach them this discipline for their life. And it is a discipline. It is something we must purposely choose every morning. One of my new favorite quotes from Charles Stanley is “Discipline, not desire, determines your destiny”.

My husband got custody of his oldest when she was 12 years old. I often feel as though I failed miserably at being the mother in the home that she needed. She was homeschooled and when we got custody she began school. One of the biggest things I feel I failed at was fitting in a Bible study/Quiet time with her. I can use the excuse of having a newborn and a toddler and not being used to having to be out the door every morning at 7:30am with all three of them… but still it is simply just an excuse.

Just because something is difficult doesn’t mean we put it aside.

I believe that I can tell the difference in the temperament of our entire household when we all begin the day in worship and fellowship with our Creator God through the study of His Word.

I hate to cook. It is difficult for me. I can cook, but it is a challenge. I had much rather pour a bowl of cereal or make a sandwich. However, even though cooking is not easy for me and it is a challenge I still do it. I still know my family must eat. I am not going to go all day (and especially not days or a whole week) without making sure my children are getting food to eat.