It’s been a really long time since I wrote any poetry. This past month my husband and I had an opportunity to sneak away for a few days to the beach and as I sat on a quiet, uncrowded, chilly beach I, for the first time in a while, wrote out a poem to my God…
My God I come to Thee
To lift my hands and sing.
My voice I do raise
That my tongue might give Thee praise.
Wholly I surrender to Thy own will and way
Knowing Thou art good and holy is Thy name.
Thy justice I can trust
When I am hurt by deeds unrighteous.
Thy mercy I can find
When the world has crushed my mind.
When my heart and soul feels faint
I know that Thou art still my strength.
When the winds and waves crash round
I know that the Rock on which I stand shall never let me drown.
Thy unchanging love which never fails me not
Shall hold me steady still when I forget what Thou hath taught.
Thy own faithfulness carries me when I am found faithless.
Thy righteousness covers me when exposed by flesh’s weakness.
When tears fill my eyes and no words can I find
Thy Spirit gently comes and guards me like a lion.
He utters and He groans with the voice of my unknowns
For He knows how to pray when all my words are gone.
When sins effect has wounded in depths no man can reach
Thy hand my God is able to heal the hurts so deep.
Thy Son who came and lived on earth to sympathize
Understands the pain of here and does not condemn me in my cries.
I adore Thee. I adore Thee. My God Thee I adore.
I thank Thee and I praise Thee for all that Thou restore.
By Thy cross, not hell, not death, nor any scheme of man
Has power to ever stop Thy will or Thy plan.
Although I cannot always see
In this valley of the shadow so deep
I hear Thy word tell me that my sight I do not need.
By faith I take each step
Trusting in all Thy promises that Thou has already kept.
Knowing that Thou art good and this life is not the end.
For by the blood of Thy Son Thou has called me friend.
So into Thy loving hands my soul I do commit.
I am bought by Thee and at Thy feet I sit.
My ear is leaning in to hear what Thou wouldst speak.
My hands and feet are Thine to use as Thou see fit.
When you walk though a season like my family is currently traveling through you deal with every emotion known to the heart. I have never felt the depth of hurt that I have in the past couple of years. My faith was shattered and shook in and from all directions. I saw ugly things that have changed me forever. There are people that I will never see the same this side of eternity.
There are words in my heart that I so desire to speak, yet I stay silent as I wait upon the Lord. I have learned that I could and probably can forgive anything, but I cannot restore until someone sees the need to seek that forgiveness. It’s a whole new depth to the gospel that I have come to understand. There is a difference in knowing someone has the ability to forgive and actually coming to that someone and asking for that forgiveness. However, I have learned that in this it is okay to shake the dust off my feet and leave that to my God. I am not obligated to carry that burden.
You see THAT is what it means to forgive. In Matthew 6:15,
But if you do not forgive others, then your Father will not forgive your transgressions.
The word forgive is aphiémi and it means I send away, release, remit, forgive. It also means to lay aside, leave, let go, omit, to depart from one and leave him to himself, so that all mutual claims are abandoned, to leave, go away from one; to depart from anyone, to give up a thing to one.
Sometimes to forgive is to simply let go and walk away. To forgive is to simply give up the hurt to God and let Him deal with it. He alone knows what is going on in the heart. He alone knows the motive, so it’s safe to release our pain to Him and trust Him to make it right in His time.
Today is the first day of the last month of the year. This month we remember the day that God kept a promise that He made way back when sin made its first ugly stain.
And between your seed and her seed… Genesis 3:15
The need for forgiveness has its beginning way back there in the garden. Our God was the first to extend the forgiveness He asks us to extend. He never asks of us what He is not willing to do Himself.