It’s time for another post in our Names of God series. Last week we learned about our Savior through His name Thura. We learned that He is the door to the Father’s house. We learned that He is the door of and for the sheep. We also learned about some of what is ours once we have walked through the Door… and what we learned was just in the foyer entrance… there is a whole house awaiting our discovery!

The name (or title) we are going to learn about today ties right into our name from last week. Remember how I shared how only strangers knock on the door… well if it’s strangers that knock… it’s our Philos that has open access. Philos is the Greek word for Friend. In todays study we learn a little about what it means to know Jesus as Philos, or Friend. 

This is My commandment, that you love one another, just as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends. You are My friends if you do what I command you. No longer do I call you slaves, for the slave does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all things that I have heard from My Father I have made known to you. You did not choose Me but I chose you, and appointed you that you would go and bear fruit, and that your fruit would remain, so that whatever you ask of the Father in My name He may give to you. This I command you, that you love one another. 

John 15:12-17

What we see in this passage is that Jesus calls us friend… if He calls us friend, then we can call Him, Friend. However, He only calls us friend if we do what He commands us… and what He commands us is to love one another.

Before we look deeper at the Greek definition of “friend” in this passage let’s take a trip to the OT to see who else has been called a friend of God and learn a little about some Hebrew definitions of friend.

We know from the Old Testament that Abraham was called a friend of God…

Did You not, O our God,

drive out the inhabitants of this land before Your people Israel

and give it to the descendants of Abraham Your friend forever?

2 Chronicles 20:7

and also we see this reminder of Abraham as God’s friend in the New Testament…

and the Scripture was fulfilled which says,

“And Abraham believed God,

and it was reckoned to him as righteousness,”

and he was called the friend of God.

James 2:23

Then we also see in the Old Testament that God spoke to Moses as a friend…

Thus the Lord used to speak to Moses face to face,

just as a man speaks to his friend.

Exodus 33:11

Becoming a friend of God is not much different than how we become friends with one another. True friends that is… not just “FB friends”. We learn a lot about friendship in John 15:12-17, 2 Chronicles 20:7, James 2:23, and Exodus 33:11.

In John 15:12-17 we learn that true friends share secrets, they share intimate details with one another. We see that they consider their friend as more important than themselves, willing to lay down their own life to help them. We see that friends are to love one another.

In 2 Chronicles 20:7 and James 2:23 we learn that true friends are friends forever. It is a covenant relationship that cannot be broken. We learn that true friends believe in one another. True friends are able to pass what I like to call “the trust test“. The trust test is not a planned out test, it just shows up, but you know when a person has passed it. Abraham passed the trust test with God when he took his son Isaac up the mountain to be sacrificed. He didn’t understand exactly what God was up to, but he knew God could be trusted, and Abraham showed God that he could be trusted as well.

I don’t make friends easy, I struggle with trust. When I was high school I had my best friend, but my best friend moved to California, so I was friendless… There was a young woman in my church that during my prayer time one day, God told me I could trust her… well I argued with God and told him no I couldn’t. At this point I didn’t even really know her. We had only spoken casually at church. However, God was right (shocking, I know!). Somehow along the way this woman passed my trust test and today she is still my friend.

In Exodus 33:11 we learn that a true friend is someone we spend face to face time with. In this day and age of online relationships… that can be rare. I understand online friends are good, but online friends can never be true friends. True friends are invested in your life. True friends know you through and through. They are invested in you and you are invested in them.

“If your brother, your mother’s son,

or your son or daughter,

or the wife you cherish,

or your friend who is as your own soul, …

Deuteronomy 13:6

This verse in its context is discussing how our obedience and allegiance to God supersedes all other relationships, but I pulled it out to show you what it says concerning a friend… a true friend is someone who is as your own soul. A true friend is someone who connects with you in your soul. You know what the other is saying or feeling or needing without having to say a word… and when that friend needs a word you are free to give it. My friend that I shared about before… I don’t have to ask her to pray for me… she just does. When I do ask her to pray, I never worry that she won’t. God has blessed me with several friends like her in the past ten years. There are several women in my life that are my friends and sisters in Christ. They know me. They are as my own soul. If God needs to tell me something and I have not been paying to good attention to Him, He will tell one of these friends, and they will let me know… They are free to check me and speak the truth to me and know that nothing they say in obedience to God will change our friendship.

A true friend is not a friend because you agree with each other on all things, or because you dress alike, act alike, look alike, think alike… a true friend is someone who is your friend in spite of, regardless of, because of all the things that make you different… because what makes you friends is who you are on the deeper level of personhood. It’s a soul to soul thing.

These two were pretty different, but they were friends. They loved. They trusted. They had a connection deeper than outward similarities. You see we may hang around in a group of people because they are just like us… but that doesn’t really make us friends. A true friend is much, much,  more.

A man of too many friends comes to ruin,

But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.

Proverbs 18:24

When we look at the Hebrew translation of the word friend in this verse we see that this is actually two completely words…

The first friend, friends, is rea and it means, friend, companion, fellow, another person, intimate, fellow, fellow-citizen, another person (weaker sense), other, another (reciprocal phrase).

The second friend, friend, is ahab and it means, to love, human love for another, human appetite for objects such as food, drink, sleep, wisdom, human love for or to God, act of being a friend 

You see we may have lots of companions, we may have a big group around us, and we may think all those fellows around us are with us and there for us… but the truth is they are not. The truth is they could be the very death of us. A true friend , is an ahab. 

If you make a sale, moreover, to your friend

or buy from your friend’s hand,

you shall not wrong one another. 

Leviticus 25:14

Friends are not to wrong one another…

O Lord, who may abide in Your tent?

Who may dwell on Your holy hill?

He who walks with integrity, and works righteousness,

And speaks truth in his heart.

He does not slander with his tongue,

Nor does evil to his neighbor,

Nor takes up a reproach against his friend

Psalm 15:1-3

…but even if it happens, if you are a true friend then you walk in forgiveness. We see a couple of beautiful pictures of this in Scripture. Let’s jump for a moment into the book of Job.

Now when Job’s three friends heard of all this adversity that had come upon him, they came each one from his own place, Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite and Zophar the Naamathite; and they made an appointment together to come to sympathize with him and comfort him.

Job 2:11

If you have ever read the book of Job you know that Job’s friend showed up with full intention to be there for Job… but along the way the visit turned a little sour. Even downright nasty. Job’s friends said some pretty harsh things to him… and ended up hurting him a lot. You would think that God would have given Job the okay to tell all three of them to, hit the road Jack and don’t let the door hit ya where the good Lord split ya, but that was not God’s response to the hurt that Job’s friends caused.

The Lord restored the fortunes of Job

when he prayed for his friends,

and the Lord increased all that Job had twofold.

Job 42:10

Yep, that’s right. The Lord did not restore Job’s fortune until he had prayed for his friends. You see Job was to be a friend. He was to act like a friend whether his friends did or not… because that’s the way our Philos, our Friend treats us and all others, even when we betray Him.

While He was still speaking, behold, Judas, one of the twelve, came up accompanied by a large crowd with swords and clubs, who came from the chief priests and elders of the people. Now he who was betraying Him gave them a sign, saying, “Whomever I kiss, He is the one; seize Him.” Immediately Judas went to Jesus and said, “Hail, Rabbi!” and kissed Him. And Jesus said to him, “Friend,do what you have come for.” Then they came and laid hands on Jesus and seized Him.

Matthew 26:47-50

Even though Judas came to betray Jesus… Jesus still treated him kindly, He still called him “friend“. He acted like a friend to Judas regardless of the actions of Judas. Judas did not determine the character and actions of Christ. However you must also know that this word friend, spoken to Judas in Matthew 26 is not the same word for friend spoken to the other disciples in John 15:12-17. Judas had already left the gathering when Jesus spoke the words in John 15.

This word for friend is hetairos and it means, a comrade, mate, partner, in kindly address, a clansman.

So what’s the definition of the word for friend in John 15?

This word is philos and it means, friend, to be friendly to one, wish him well, a friend, an associate, he who associates familiarly with one, a companion, one of the bridegroom’s friends who on his behalf asked the hand of the bride and rendered him various services in closing the marriage and celebrating the nuptials.

I love this! When Jesus told the disciples that they were His friends, He was also giving them a mission… He was saying you are the Bridegroom’s  friends, you are the friends who on My behalf are to ask the hand of the bride and you are to render Me various services in closing the marriage and celebrating the nuptials. Being a friend of Jesus is about being the one who goes out on His behalf and asks the hand of His bride and you know that we become His bride when we become part of His church, and His church is His body, we are of His very own soul and He as ours. When we know Him as Friend we know that He is always our Friend… even if we mess up. However He also acts like a friend, which means He is going to check us up when we need it… but He is never going to wrong us. He is going to be there with us and for us forever, because true friends are friends forever.

Oh precious one do you know Him as Friend?

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You might also enjoy  these posts:

Accountability, Woman to Woman, Love Them To Hell, Hurt By The Church, More On Friendship, The Art of Friendship

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