Okay ladies here’s the thing, we have a couple more days of trash take out and then we are going to begin to dig even deeper… the easy part is taking out the obvious trash. The hard part is when we begin to do inventory on all the rest. The hard part is when we have to discern on what’s good, what’s useful, what’s relevant for our life today, what needs to be passed on to someone else, what needs to be put away in the attic, and what might be discovered as trash after closer inspection.

Don’t panic, this is not just a “Thou Shall Not” challenge… we are just clearing out the clutter so we can see more clearly.

Today’s trash take out might be a little more difficult… tv shows and the chick-flick. Aren’t you glad I waited till after Valentine’s Day to initiate this challenge..

This challenge has to begin with waking up your senses. Shannon Ethridge shared about an experiment she does with youth as she teaches on sexuality. She records twelve minutes of prime time tv (she chose Friends and Seinfeld) and asks them to watch and count every sexual innuendo they see or hear. She said the group always did the same thing, they caught the first three or four but then would get caught up in the humor and jokes and would forget to give the sign, most would end up with eleven or twelve sexual innuendos. When in reality in that twelve minutes there were forty-one.

Shannon writes, “As a society, we have become so desensitized by sexual messages that we often unscrew our heads, put them under the Lazy-boy recliner, and tolerantly allow the television to fill our minds with worldly scripts. Once our minds are corrupted, our hearts memorize these scripts, and then they seep into our lives.”

Everything you choose to take in through your mind can be stored up in your heart, and it is your heart that determines the direction you will take and the choices you will make in the future when confronted with temptation. If you fill your mind with images of sexually compromising comments and situations, you will become desensitized to similar scenarios in your own life. ~ Shannon Ethridge

I used to love Friends. There were several shows that I used to love to watch and would laugh my butt off… but on December 9, 2001, I wholly surrendered my life to Christ… and when I sat down to watch these shows after this date, this moment, I was appalled and embarrassed by what I saw.

I could not watch it. I had never heard or seen it through the eyes of Christ and now as I watched it… I couldn’t laugh. I was laughing at the things that my Jesus went to the cross for. It just wasn’t funny to me anymore. 

My sweet sister… you have a choice. For the next  thirty-one days view your tv through the eyes of Christ. If you ask Him, trust me He will let you see. He came to bring sight to the blind… but first we must admit that we cannot see.

Now we must discuss the chick-flick.

If nothing else, for this next thirty-one days as you fast from the flick, look at how much money you can save from not spending the funds on a movie and popcorn 🙂

My husband and I rarely go to the movies. When we do go we are diligent to check out the movie thoroughly on Plugged In before we go see it. I don’t care what Hollywood rates it… if it is full of sexual content that exists outside the marriage bed, even without nudity, we do not attend.

You see I don’t find this sacred act between man and wife as a joke to be ridiculed and demeaned by people who are trashing it up and making it of no more importance than going to the bathroom. I also am not going to waste my time watching two strangers exchange bodily fluids. I most definitely am not going to pay to see that.

Anyway.

The chic-flick, ladies here’s the thing. Let’s get serious. For the married woman reading this… I used to hear married people say this, “It doesn’t matter where you get your appetite as long as you eat at home”. When I was living apart from Christ and unmarried and I heard that I thought, well that makes sense… but now as a married woman and surrendered to Christ… THAT IS ONE OF THE MOST STUPID THINGS I HAVE EVER HEARD!

Marriage is about true intimacy, you can’t have intimacy if your mind is having sex with one person and your body with another. My husband wants all of me and I want all of him. I want him to be aroused and fulfilled by me alone and he deserves the same from me. I don’t want him comparing my body to the latest top model and therefore I am not going to compare him to the leading man’s scripted words in the latest love story.

Men are designed to be aroused visually… ladies we are designed to be aroused emotionally. When a man says the right things and is able to smile the right way… How do you think Eve was deceived? She was emotionally manipulated and the words of the serpent captivated her and then she partook of what she knew was wrong. Unable to walk away.

Let me ask you… what fruit was dangled before you in the last chic-flick movie you watched? Did it make you appreciate your husband, or did it make you wish he was more like so and so? Did it make you long again for the excitement of that first kiss, that first date, that unknown angst?

We must guard our hearts.

We must guard our emotions.

Single ladies… that goes for you too.

Hollywood glamorizes the start of a relationship and then leaves you with this false expectation that this is true love… it’s not. True love is a love that stays after the excitement of the new wears off and stays long enough to have that excitement pop up and surprise you over and over again because true love is patient and it endures all things. We need to protect our marriages and if we are single, our future marriages “by resisting any thoughts that may evoke feelings of disillusionment and disappointment with reality” (Shannon Ethridge). 

Shannon has a little check list to ask yourself before you watch, read, or listen so that you may be proactive in protecting and guarding your heart so that you might become a woman of sexual and emotional integrity.

Ask yourself:

* Does this glamorize ideas or situations that oppose my Christian values?

*Is it uplifting to my spirit, and does it make me grateful for what God has given me, or does it make me depressed and dissatisfied?

*Does this cause me to think about things that build my character, or does it tear it down?

I know this post has been a little more forceful than the last two… but it comes after a night of  Awana T&T when I had 4th-6th grade girls who were too distracted talking about little boyfriends and singing “I got passion in my pants” and “I’m sexy and I know it” to be putting the Word of God in their hearts… it was already too full of trash…

Just think where their little hearts will be at your age if they continue down the path they are on… guess what you are leading the way… so what path are you going to walk? When the little hearts around you follow you where will you lead them…  

Today in our Thirty-three Day Challenge we continue to work on taking out the trash…

Day two:
Today I want you to put away the love stories, the romance novels… they. got. to. go. Yes, even Christian romance novels. I am a woman who loves books, so I won’t encourage you to dump these novels in the trash as I did the cheap magazines, but for the next thirty-two days I challenge you to put them out of sight. Don’t read them.

Then if after this challenge you can read the ones you have without grieving the Holy Spirit within you then by all means keep them, but if after this fast from them, you pick them up to read and your new starved and fresh eyes sees them in a different way… by all means trash them.

Now my beloved, we are women. Our hearts are drawn to the romance novel because we were created for love. We were created to be appreciated and honored and admired. We were “presented” to Adam in the garden by our Heavenly Father.

When we are married to our husbands we are presented to them. The doors are swung open and we step out into his view and we search his eyes for “that look”, you know the one… the one that says, WOW!!!

We were created to be swept off our feet by our knight in shining armor… to be fought for and desired more than any other… to be worth dying for… we yearn for another to love us like this… by choice… not because they are related to us.

So we read these romance novels and we picture we are the heroine and we get to create our man in our image…

There lies the problem.

“While most women don’t lust after men’s bodies (although there are certainly exceptions to this rule), we cross the line in sexual integrity in other ways. When we engage in emotional affairs, mental fantasies, and unhealthy comparisons,we are crossing the line of sexual integrity and undermining God’s plan to grant us ultimate sexual and emotional fulfillment with (our current our future) husband. We need to make a covenant with the eyes of our hearts not to look at other people (real or imagined) to fulfill our emotional needs and desires in ways that compromise our sexual integrity, whether we are married or single.”

~ Shannon Ethridge (quote from Every Woman’s Battle, pg 26)

Our God knows our desire. He created it. He is the ultimate lovesick fool… He is the One that has woven His whole love story into our lives. He is the One who willingly has come to rescue His bride… and yes He is the One who will come as our Knight in shining armor. He is the One who sweeps us off our feet and takes us in His arms and wisks us away to Paradise and showers us with undying love and devotion. He is the one who looks at us and goes, WOW!

 

If you want to read a romance story read the Song of Solomon.

There are three main characters in this book of Scripture, the woman, the man, and the chorus group 🙂 Read through the chapters of this book and discern who is speaking when.
I write in my Bible so I took a pink colored pencil and colored a circle over the number of the verses that was the woman speaking and used a blue for the man and green for the chorus group.

Spend today meditating on this verse

 

Oh precious one, your love is to be awoken by your husband or your future husband and all love before that belongs to Christ. It does not belong to a fictional male but female created characters. These romance novels introduce you to the body of a man with the mind of a female. You are putting expectations on your current or future husband that they will never be able to measure up to. This will cause you to be weighted down in false disappointment in them and in your relationship.

It’s a false expectation…
It’s deception… and whose the father of that?

I know first hand the destruction that can come from these type of books. I began with Sweet Valley High and then by late Jr High I was reading Harlequin Romance novels. I had in my mind and head how this experience was to be. I had awakened my mind to an emotion my body and heart was not ready for.

It led me down a road of heartache and destruction that almost killed me emotionally, spiritually, and physically… It began little… but a little sin never satisfies… it only makes you crave for more. You seek sin like an addict seeks their next hit. You hate it, you hate yourself, but you keep thinking, keep convincing yourself, that this time will be different… this time will satisfy… but it never does and it never will.

Truth is what is real.
Truth is what will satisfy.
Jesus is truth.
God’s Word is truth.

If you want to get caught up in a love story, get caught up in the one that will be told until all eternity.

We will begin our Thirty-three Day Challenge by throwing out the trash…

Day one trash take-out:

Go through the house. If you have Glamour’s, Cosmo’s, Redbook’s, and yes I even mean the Teen Beats and Pop Stars pre-teen magazines that are designed to get your young girls addicted to gossip and the idolization of mere man instead of the God-Man, if you have these in your house throw them out.

When you go shopping for the next thirty-three days and you are standing there in line to check out… don’t pick up that magazine to flip through it as you wait. Don’t even look at the cover or read the cover page article headings…  If you are at the doctor or any other place where you have to wait and there are magazines scattered about… don’t do it.

Go prepared. Bring your Bible… what are you studying in church, in Sunday school, what did the pastor preach on last Sunday, what was that question you had that you were afraid to ask about… research it in the Scriptures… or just make conversation with the person beside you… give them your smile and invest some of your time in their lives… you just might make a difference in their eternity.

Get rid of every single magazine that tries to tells you “how to be a woman” and “how to look as a woman” outside of God’s Word… any magazine that is centered on pulling you toward the mindset of the world instead of the Word. Throw it out today.

Don’t wait.

Do it now.

Don’t save one for later.  Don’t stick them in a closet. Put them in the trash and dump the coffee grounds and the kids leftover oatmeal on top of them.

I don’t care if it’s a new issue that you haven’t read yet and it has a great article in it that you think you must read. Trust me… what ever advice they think they have is pointless and insignificant compared to what God wants to tell you today in and through His Word.

If you are married or plan to be married one day these magazines can be just as damaging to your marriage as men’s pornographic magazine’s. These magazine’s usually attempt to teach you how to manipulate a man and yourself in order to get a man or please a man… manipulation is the work of Satan. It’s his tactic, not a woman of God’s. Whose actions do you want to learn to imitate?

And here’s some more information to help you throw out today’s trash…

Thin, sexualised and digitally enhanced images of women are linked with women’s experiences of poor body image, depression and anxiety and eating disorders. The images contribute to self-harming behaviours and not performing well academically.

Women’s attitudes toward their own bodies are worse after looking at thin media images.

In young teenage girls, looking at pictures of thin, idealised models is likely to cause lowered satisfaction with their body and a high state of depression. Reading fashion and beauty magazines is associated with wanting to lose weight and initiating diets.

A five-year study found that reading dieting advice in magazines was associated with skipping meals, smoking, vomiting and using laxatives in teenage girls.

The American Psychological Association recently found that sexually objectifying material contributes to significant harm to young women.

“..there is evidence that sexualisation contributed to impaired cognitive performance in college-aged women, and related research suggests that viewing material that is sexually objectifying can contribute to body dissatisfaction, eating disorders, low self-esteem, depressive affect, and even physical health problems in high-school-aged girls and in young women.

“In addition to leading to feelings of shame and anxiety, sexualising treatment and self-objectification can generate feelings of disgust toward one’s physical self. Girls may feel they are “ugly” and “gross” or untouchable. …strong empirical evidence indicates that exposure to ideals of sexual attractiveness in the media is associated with greater body dissatisfaction among girls and young women.”
Girls are told early their bodies aren’t good enough – they need continual upgrade and enhancement.

 

Spend today meditating on Psalm 139.
When a lie comes to your mind about your worth, your beauty, your value… repeat

 

When the Scripture says your soul knows it very well let me share with you what the Hebrew translation and definition is of this word soul…

The word is nephesh and it means soul, self, life, creature, person, appetite, mind, living being, desire, emotion, passion, that which breathes, the breathing substance or being, the man himself, self, person or individual, the activity of mind, will, and character…

Read through Psalm 139 again and take a deep breathe when you read Psalm 139:14.

Take this deep breath and feel this breathe of  air inhale deep within you. Close your eyes and picture this breath as these words of God pass through your nose, and you can feel this air rise up into your mind, and you can feel it being pulled down through your neck, into the very depths of your inner being. You can feel it circling your heart and tightening within your chest as you breathe in this truth of God, breath it in as a true breath of fresh air. Take this breath in deep and purposeful. Take it into your heart and then slowly feel it exhale out of your very core…

Can you feel it?

Can you feel Him?

That is what it means when God says your soul knows it very well that His works are wonderful and if you are His work… then you, precious and beautiful one, are wonderful too. Breathe in wonderful one… breathe in His Word of truth.

All day today… when you look in the mirror and are tempted to go, ugh! Stop and remember Psalm 139 and take a deep breath and breath in Psalm 139:14…

I am up for a challenge… I would like you to join me in this challenge.
I am a Christian.
I am still proud to carry this name no matter what the world has done to try to discredit it.
I carry it with honor.
I do not carry it lightly.

As a Christian I have read the end of the book.
I know that this world is only going to get worse.
I am not here to save the world.
I am here to be used by God to save those who are His out of the world.
This challenge is for those that are His.

I don’t know about you, but I am tired of the church not looking any different than the world. I am tired of cults that profess the name of Christ being lumped in with the true Church. I am tired of the lost not being able to find the way of peace because the highway of holiness is so crowded and blocked with briars and thorns and fruitcakes that they can’t get through to see the real Christ. I am ready to be the tree of life that Zacchaeus was able to climb to get over the crowd in order to see Jesus.

I have just finished reading What Are You Waiting For by Dannah Gresh and am now in the middle of Every Woman’s Battle by Shannon Ethridge. Both of these books mentioned this challenge.

Then I saw this:

 

After reading these books and seeing this video and knowing my own experiences and weighing it against about what I know of the Word of God, I can’t help but feel my heart break from the marriages that I am sure have fallen apart simply because that serpent of old snuck his way in and wreaked havoc. I hurt as I think of how many marriages have not even been because the girl couldn’t see God’s man for the fog of Twilight and the fluff of the fairytales. To many of us are too weak and too desensitized to Satan’s presence to even know when to fight him, much less how.

It’s time for the Church to get busy about the Father’s business.
It’s time for the bride to make herself ready for the Bridegroom.

Today I ask that you bear with me in a little foolishness… because I too am jealous for you with a godly jealousy. I want you to be presented to your Bridegroom as a pure virgin… standing unashamed before Him because you made yourself ready for Him. If your Groom were to come today would you drop your head in shame or would your head be lifted up ready to be received by Him?

I am afraid that many of us have indeed been deceived by the serpent… Adam and Eve alike. We have no doubt been led astray from them the simplicity and purity of devotion to Christ.

So if you will bear with me in my foolishness to believe that the Word of God is true and relevant in our day and powerful beyond measure… if you will bear with me in my foolishness to believe that their is still believers in the world today who desire to carry the name of Christ with honor and truly desire to live a sanctified life proclaiming His excellencies… then take this challenge with me.

The challenge:
For thirty-three days.
One day for every year that Christ gave us give to Him.
For thirty-three days we shall live to Him and not ourselves in a purposeful way. For thirty-three days let us cleanse ourselves from all defilement of the flesh.

Beginning February 14th, the secular day of “love” let us begin to live true, real, Biblical, Christ love.

The challenge will end on March 17th, St Patrick’s Day, the day given in remembrance to the man who is believed to have ran all the snakes out of Ireland.

Let us, in this thirty-three day challenge run that serpent of old out of our minds, out of our home, out of our church by loving the LORD our God with all our heart, all our mind, all our soul, and all our strength.

How do we do this?

On February 14th put out the trash.

Turn off the television programs that feed your flesh, your lusts, your pride, and yes, your depression. If you wouldn’t watch it sitting next to your Mom or your Pastor or kids Sunday School class turn it off. If it places a burden of dissatisfaction in you and makes you see yourself or your spouse in a negative way, turn it off.

Do the same with what you read, and the music you listen to, and with the conversations going on around you at work, at school, on facebook and twitter, or even in your home with your family.

Take that time and instead study God’s Word.

Listen to God’s Word.

Read God’s Word.

Thirty-three days is all I am asking for.

I will do the challenge with you.

Each day I will share a Scripture to meditate on.

I will share with you excerpts from the books above and together we will work to become women of integrity.

A woman of integrity lives a life that lines up with her Christian beliefs. She lives according to the standard of love rather than the law. She does not claim to be a follower of Christ yet disregard His many teachings on sexual immorality, lustful thoughts, immodest dress, and inappropriate talk. A woman of integrity lives what she believes about God, and it shows everywhere from the boardroom to the bedroom.  ~ Shannon Ethridge

This is not a flippant challenge I am asking you to join.

It is a challenge that could save your marriage if it is struggling.

It is a challenge that can lift you up out of the pit of defeat.

It is a challenge that can give you the strength to say no to what before you caved in to.

It is a challenge that can free you from your past and prepare you for your future.

It is a challenge that can open your eyes to the invisible chains that have been entangling you.

It is a challenge that you are not to do alone. Pray for a fellow sister in Christ to openly take it with you, not someone you pushed into it, but someone who is serious about it, God will send her.

Don’t try to force your spouse to join you, but explain to them what you are doing, and how serious it is, they will need to know because I have no doubt that there will be changes you will have to make to meet this challenge.

It is a challenge that I want you to pray about before you commit to it.

That’s why it doesn’t begin until Feb 14th.

Pray and if the Lord wills… join me.